[Meta thread] Iron's PokeRole Adventure: The Skull Ruins

[Lord Windos]

@Lord Windos No, don't do that. EVER, PLEASE. If Ventus leaves the group, Shiva would likely never get over it. (Probably leave as well, following him) Outta-chara, you'd bereave me of a big big part of fun in Iron's campaign. You want to throw away everything we had and break Shiva's heart before they even got together...?

If Ventus leaves the group, Shiva would likely never get over it. (Probably leave as well, following him) Outta-chara, you'd bereave me of a big big part of fun in Iron's campaign. You want to throw away everything we had and break Shiva's heart before they even got together...?

And THAT is one reason why I'm not sure Ventus leaving would be an entirely good thing.  And why I'm trying to fix the mess I purposely put Nathan into, or at least get it on track to being repaired.  Nathan's more agreeable than you might think, @Lord Windos...but there needs to be a compromise somewhere, and Nathan's going to (hopefully) have a decent catalyst for that coming up...

....*Sigh* Guys, I want to be honest with you right now: I am getting more than a little tired of playing Ventus with the way things are now, and with just how DIFFICULT it is to work with and around his myriad traits and issues.

Don't get me wrong, I don't HATE my character or wish to see him be *Poofed!* out of existence unceromonously, but the problem I have with him and that everyone else in the group has is plain, simple, and straight: he's just too dark and morally ambiguous for the current group/setting he's in. Let me explain in greater detail, as I am want to do: 

His various hang ups, the amorality/blue orange morality that he has, his frankly tragic and brionic history and frequent falls from grace, and just being deeply scarred at his core makes him a very nuaced, complex character, making him feel more 'real' and sympathetic to the average reader. Problem is, all that complexity I made has ALSO turned him into a fairly ruthless and unscrumpelous individual, with hatred and phobias so pitch black and deep that you eclipse the sun with it, and a moral compass that decidedly point to wherever the hell he decides it does on a given minute. In a DnD/Pathfinder campaign or one where characters/setting isn't as idealistic or....light hearted?, Ven actions and motivations would not have an eye batted at them (Most likely, anyway) after some downtime for a group to familiarize themselves with him.

However, in Iron's PokeRole world/campaign and the character he journeying along side....all of that has more or less caused more conflict, problems, drama, and emotional harm than just about anything else in the campaign that I can think of. Name one time that Ventus has not invariably or variably caused someone grief over his well meaning action, and I can name 10 or MORE where he does just that. The amount arguments that the researcher has had with Nathan alone over topics most people would not even consider an issue is too numerous to count, and his worrying and protectiveness nature tends to be as self destrutctive as genuinely helpful/appreciated.

My character does have his good qualites, though. His compassion/understanding/empathy is rather obvious, he's always eager and willing to help out just about anyone that doesn't raise alarms with him, whole heartily loves and cares for his Pokémon family, has fairly noble goal of using his research to better the relationships between man and Pokémon, and just how sociable/eloquent he can be with others. When all the other black/grey aspect of his character come to the forefront, though, its VERY hard to remember and care/empathize with him in and out of game. Those negative qualities become especially when Nathan, basteon of moral goodness and one of the big heroes of the story, and Shiva, the least devisive and most accepting and caring individual one might find in the game, find my own character's action severely wanting at worst and eye raising more often than not.....

.....*Sigh* When I made Ventus and later crafted his story as we went along the journey, I expect that his dark history and darker than most morality would be just something that the group would take as a given, quickly adapt/accept/compromise to it or get that point sooner than not, and we all be on our merry way for the most part. What turned out was having him constantly at odds with everyone in some way, shape, or form, me and him having to bend over backwards and make ill fitting/cumbersome actions that by all rights he would not make were he in a vacuum without us informing him, trying to steer him through the many landmines that lay between him and Nate over many a subject while also not losing himself or who he is at his core.....you get the picture.

Its getting to the point where I feel that I have to slog through his demons and bugbears while keeping him on a wavy, hard to make out course that make everyone happy, which quite obviously doesn't make ME or him very happy as well since its so bloody difficult. Its one of the main reason him not giving a fuck about Nathan anymore was so gratifying/relieving to him, as letting go of his obligations and actively working on their friendship took away a burden that had caused him more pain than not. The fact that a simple day out with Shiva is something to be cherished, coveted, and planned for, rather it being a pleasant standerd for our character speaks volumes in of itself, honestly.

Because of all the above, the fact that now that I have played this game long enough to know that the way I developed my character was not that great to begin with (Especially seeing as he's more of a Refined and Brutal Enforcer than Truly Empathetic Researcher at this point), and simply just desiring to play the game with you guys without having to either weakly justifying my chara's actions/doing stuff VERY contrary to his nature, its why I have thought of other characters to replace him that would just be a better fit for EVERYTHING. A clean slate that I can tailor make to at least be agreeable or non-provactive with the others, just having him do his thing without much resistence and having fun with you guys without worrying whether or not the next shoe is going to fall soon...

I know that having Ventus leave NOW of all times would be increadibly jarring, no matter how delicately and carefully such an endevour is planned not to harm anyone in game, but think of the good sides.

No more moral conflict. Minimal hassle and arguments, If we can help it. No more murderous rampages, justified or not. Calm acceptance of each other without any qualifiers or prejudice. Not having to tip toe around HIS problems. Unrestricted access to magical/magical seeming things without a panic attack. No more 'help.' And, most importantly of all: everyone can simply be happy and the play damn game without drama every 5 or 10 pages in the Game Thread.

Think about it.